Will it save me money or time or work
Or hike up my pay with a welcome jerk?
What drudgery, worry, or loss will it cut?
Can it get me out of a personal rut?
I wonder how much it would do for my health –
Could it show me a way to acquire more wealth –
Better things for myself and the kids and the wife –
                                    Or how to quit work somewhat early in the life?

I see that you’ve spent quite a big wad of dough
To tell me things you think I should know,
How your plant is so big, so fine, so strong –
And your founder has whiskers, so handsomely long.
So he started teh business in old ninety-two–
How tremendously interesting that is — to you.
He built up the thing with the blood of his life –
I’ll rush home and tell my wife!

Your Machinery is modern and oh so complete –
Your “rep” is so flawless — your work is so neat.
Your motto is “Quality” — with a capital “Q” –
No wonder I’m tired of “your” and of “you.”
So tell me quick and tell me true –
Or else, my friend, to heck with you –
Less how this product came to be –
More what the darn thing does for me!
-Anonymous